


these furs don't mix

by words_on_pages



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Harry is a dog, Louis is a cat, M/M, dare i say fluff?, idek what this fic is, it's ridiculousness, ive been wanting to write arrogant cat Louis forever
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-06
Updated: 2015-09-06
Packaged: 2018-04-19 09:24:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4741199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/words_on_pages/pseuds/words_on_pages
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis is a cat. Harry is a dog.</p>
            </blockquote>





	these furs don't mix

**Author's Note:**

> I honestly don't even know what to say. This is the silliest shit I've ever written and yet I couldn't _not_ write it.
> 
> also here are pics of H & L as a [dog and a cat](http://words-on-pages.tumblr.com/post/134157940440/these-furs-dont-mix-words-2200-louis-is-a)!

Louis eyed the carpet warily from his perch on top of the recliner, swishing his tail erratically back and forth in irritation. Why did Harry always get free reign of the floor? Louis had been with Jack for- well okay so he didn’t exactly grasp the concept of time all that well but Jack had been his owner for a long time before Harry had come along. He had seniority.

Why Jack had felt the need to bring home a dog in the first place Louis would never understand.

Louis groomed himself meticulously while Harry shed disgusting brown and black dog hair all over the place. Louis warmed Jack’s lap while he watched TV at night and Harry panted his disgusting breath into Jack’s face. Louis lapped delicately at the water in his dish while Harry drank sloppily from his bowl and allowed water to drip profusely from his jaw all over the floor surrounding it.

There was absolutely no comparison. Louis was a superior creature to Harry.

His ears twitched as he watched Harry, who was utterly oblivious of his attention, slobber all over a squeaky plastic banana on the floor. Disgusting. He kneaded his front paws into the chair a few times and pulled himself up preparing to leap past him so he could make his way into the bedroom. Like a sixth sense, Harry lost all interest in the yellow toy and glanced attentively up at him, mouth open and tongue lolling to the side, making small pants.

Louis lowered himself back down, eyes livid. He was _not_ scared to jump down there with him. There was just always a prickly expectation that made the fur raise slightly along his spine. If he jumped down, he would need to dart into the bedroom as quickly as possible, heart thundering, because that _thing_ would pop up and come lumbering after him. Louis was loathe to do anything in a hurry. This was his house. His domain. Louis sauntered wherever he pleased, he did _not_ run.

He licked one of his paws and tried to look for all the world like he was going to stay atop that recliner for eternity. Harry, dumbly, went back to his squeaky banana.

“Come on, Harry!” Jack announced, coming from the bedroom. “Come on! Do you wanna go for a walk? Do you? Yes you do!”

Louis flicked his tail and blinked owlishly at the commotion. Harry had jumped up and was vibrating with excitement, tail wagging fiercely. Louis never understood this routine between his owner and nemesis. Why go outside when there were so many soft, lovely surfaces to curl up on inside? Why would you want to be leashed and lead around like a subservient thing? No. Just no. It was most definitely not Louis’ _thing_ and he was glad Jack never attempted to do that with him. He wouldn’t dare.

As much as the practice baffled him he was grateful for the break, was already anticipating laying in his favorite spot in front of the sliding glass doors where the sun shined in and swathed his body with heat. Eyeing the way Jack had Harry in a firm grip, Louis jumped down and walked leisurely past him on his way to the water dish. Just out of reach. Louis plopped his butt down and licked his elbow in satisfaction, enjoying the tense set of Harry’s body as he cocked his head at Louis. Too bad, he lazily batted his eyes at him.

“Louis, really?” Jack blinked at him, hands on hips. “I’m not dumb and I know what you’re doing.”

He wasn’t doing _anything_. He laid down on the carpet and stretched his body, rolling onto his back while pawing lightly at the air in Harry’s direction. As he predicted Harry went apeshit, straining on his collar eyes wide in excitement, wanting so badly to pounce onto the tantalizing creature in front of him. And Louis would easily admit it about himself; he was tantalizing.

Jack sighed and pulled on Harry’s collar, dragging him to the door. “Keep that up, Lou, and I’ll unhook his leash and let him at you.”

Louis rolled over in one swift movement and watched them carefully as they left, closing the door behind them. Well _that_ threat was uncalled for.

Now that they were gone Louis felt bored. He was _not_ pouting, but the least Jack could have done was let him torture Harry just a little bit longer. Either way at least now he got to enjoy the place to himself. He stood up and pranced slowly over to his favorite spot in the sun. The carpet was already warm as Louis laid down again. He sprawled out on his side, stretching his body as far as he could go in order to soak up as much of the sun’s heat pouring down as he could. His eyes closed into slits and he was happy as a clam.

Napping was Louis’ absolute favorite thing to do in the entire world. He abhorred activity. How were people not content to just sit and do nothing all day? Jack had tried several times to entice him into play with some revolting plastic stick that had a stretchy feathery thing on the end. Louis had stared at him steadily, eyes unblinking, wondering if his owner had gone insane. He was not touching that. Jack had gotten the message quickly enough.

The warmth from the sun pouring over his body brought his heartbeat down to an infrequent steady thump. At peace, hazy, he found himself drifting into a delicious nap. And he needed one badly, was so tired that he found himself pulled under fast and deep.

Sometime later he woke up in degrees of awareness. His first thought was the wonderful roasting heat of the sun on him. The second thought was how peaceful everything seemed, clearly they were still out on the walk. And thirdly, after several more moments he became aware of the steady in and out of breathing behind him. What the fuck?

Louis realized his forehead was pressed up into something soft and intensely warm- and had brown and black fur. What? He lifted his head and realized he had been nuzzled into the crook where Harry’s front leg met his chest. He twisted his head around further to see that Harry was looking at him with tired eyes, his mouth hanging open reminiscent of a friendly smile.

The sun was no longer shining in, more of a dusky light which meant that Louis had been passed out for a very long time. And that meant that the delicious intense warmth he was feeling was from Harry’s body heat. Which was.

He didn’t _hate_ it. Is the thing. But Louis was also a creature that found himself drugged by any type of warmth, so technically he was under the influence right now and couldn’t be held responsible for his opinions.

He’s not sure how the hell Harry had managed to lay down next to him without waking him. Long-haired jolly bastard. Louis hadn’t moved yet and he honestly kind of wanted to nuzzle his head back into the crook of Harry’s body. But like. No. He would not let heat impair his decision making process. He would _not_.

He saw a bright flashing light of something that distracted him enough to turn his head behind him (and if the motion incidentally pressed him further into Harry’s ginormous furnace body then so be it, he had to know what that light was). Jack was standing a few feet from them with that rectangular thing he kept with him at all times and a flash was intermittently blinding him as he moved in closer and backed up, all the while cooing. Louis stiffened because some instinct reared up inside of him and somehow he _sensed_ that he didn’t like what Jack was doing. That he should feel greatly offended. His tension grew.

But then warm wet heat enveloped his forehead as Harry’s tongue lapped at him and it felt…comforting. Damn him. Against his will, his body relaxed. And against his will he stretched his head back a little further so that Harry could continue. Because- well his tongue was definitely wider than Louis’ and he had _reach_. A flicker of lazy pleasure shot through him, strong enough that even though Jack’s cooing had just gotten louder and the flashes were going off at faster intervals, Louis could not bring himself to pull away.

But really, he needed to stop this. Right now. He was going to open his eyes (yes, they were closed in contentment, Louis damned himself to hell) he was going to roll away from Harry’s large hairy body and march straight into the bedroom to curl up with dignity on Jack’s pillow.

“Oh my god, I can’t wait to show these to everyone!”

Louis slitted one of his eyes open in time to see Jack hopping around like a mad man. He would never understand humans. Ever.

Harry slowed his licking and Louis let up on his purring. Shit. He hadn’t even realized he was _purring_. But he was. Deep contented vibrations like continuous rolling marbles in his chest. And loud. Louis flicked his ears in embarrassment, horrified at how loud he had been purring and thankful that he had quieted down. Louis did not purr for just _anyone_.

Louis was far too awake for all of this. He just needed to go back to the oblivion of sleep and deal with this in the morning.

“Alright guys, lets go to bed!” Jack smiled as he started to walk toward his room. He stopped halfway there and turned around, frowning. “Louis and Harry, come on.”

Louis was very prepared to get up. He just. He wasn’t getting up.

And neither was Harry. That was the more bizarre thing because Louis tended to do whatever the hell he wanted but Harry was very attentive to Jack’s commands. It was one of the things Louis had always looked down on him for. As if Louis would ever listen to what Jack had to say. Jack could tell him not to throw up hair on the carpet until he was blue in the face but Louis was still going to do it when he damn well needed to. And sometimes on Jack’s pillow to spite him.

All Jack had to do was say “Sit!” to Harry and he did. Louis could understand it sometimes, like when he had a piece of banana in his hand, but Harry did it even when Jack didn’t have a treat in his hand. Louis could not wrap his head around that. Jack gave him treats but he usually dropped them on the floor in front of him because he knew damn well Louis wasn’t going to anything to ‘earn’ them. The idea was simply barbaric.

“Come on you two.” Jack tried for an enthusiastic voice again, but then it turned a bit lost. “Harry?”

Harry literally was not moving. And so- Louis didn’t either. He wasn’t sure what had shifted here or why, but he was satisfied in a way that irritated him because he couldn’t control it. It was in his nature.

“Fine then, I don’t know what the deal is with you two tonight but I’m going to bed.” He hesitated as if he thought that was a threat that they might react to. Louis continued to stare down the hallway at him, could tell that Harry was staring too. Jack finally sighed and walked into his room closing the door.

He turned his head toward Harry, who in turn bumped his wet nose against Louis’ forehead. Ugh. It was so disgusting. Louis felt his ears drag down and his tail whip around in annoyance. He was just about to hiss in order to make his displeasure clear, when suddenly Harry huffed his disgusting breath at him and started to lick him gently with his tongue.

Well. That was better, he conceded. Louis allowed himself to be bathed for a few more minutes before he batted a paw at Harry’s snout. He rolled over leisurely and began kneading his two front paws into Harry’s chest. He didn’t know why he found it necessary to do this before he settled down to sleep but it was instinctive and he needed it. After a few minutes he felt himself relax further and curled his head into the crook it had been in earlier. He felt Harry adjust his body into a more comfortable sleeping position and stilled.

Louis had to grudgingly admit to himself that he had never been more comfortable than he was now.  He could get used to this. But like- he wasn’t going to. It was definitely a onetime thing. Harry was still his nemesis. This dumb creature who liked to woof and pounce and vibrate with far too much energy and wag his long hair around to ruin every possible surface.

He was barely a tolerable creature. But for tonight Louis would overlook that and allow Harry to enjoy Louis’ warmth and the fantastic purr that reverberated throughout his body.  It was the least he could do. It was selfless really.

But tomorrow. He would pretend this never happened.

**Author's Note:**

> [tumblr](http://words-on-pages.tumblr.com/) ❤️


End file.
